i don't like sucking hair
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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