I want to stick my p in your. b.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
