i think my tv is drunk
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
