I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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