Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
