Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
