Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
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