I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
