Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
