all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize