I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
