who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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