dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
