I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
