the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
the room spins SO much faster in panama
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
