Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Randomize
