Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Randomize
