Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
