spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
