I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Randomize
