we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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