You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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