"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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