I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Dear god my vagina.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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