I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
My vagina is very pro this idea
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
