I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
