So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
i am craving dick and cupcakes
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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