Me too!
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
