At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
