Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Randomize
