Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I want to fling myself into the sun
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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