I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
