apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
