I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize