I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
