do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
