We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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