Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
