dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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