redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
ttyl tear gas
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
