its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
