I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
