Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize