Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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