It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
