Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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