You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
