Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
