hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Randomize
