What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
